Advocacy, Empowerment, and Seeing Through My Child’s Eyes
By Taylor Crisp, Spokane County Parent Coalition Self Advocate
Raising A Voice
As my daughter grows from a child into a teenager, I’ve witnessed a beautiful transformation. She’s learning to speak up for herself. She’s beginning to express her wants and needs more clearly to me. But when it comes to advocating for herself in front of others, she still hesitates. That’s where I come in: not to speak over her, but to amplify her voice.
When a child feels safe enough to share what’s on their mind, it means you’ve become their safe place. They’re not asking you to take over; they’re asking you to hand them the microphone. Once I started seeing the world through her lens, I realized that advocacy isn’t just about what I think she needs. It’s about what she knows she needs.
Parenting a neurodivergent preteen isn’t easy. It’s messy, emotional, and sometimes exhausting. But it’s also a powerful opportunity to stand beside them and speak up with them. You can advocate for your child without silencing them. Both can be true.
“Our children shouldn’t have to change who they are to fit into the world.”
Trusting Instincts While Listening to Experts
One of the most challenging lessons I’ve learned is striking a balance between professional advice and parental instinct. Yes, professionals bring expertise. But they don’t live in your home. They don’t see the daily struggles, the subtle shifts, the quiet moments of resilience.
My daughter has a 504 plan. When the school initially offered minimal accommodations, I doubted myself. Maybe she didn’t need more? However, I then noticed her academic and social well-being begin to decline. That was my wake-up call.
Now, I advocate more fiercely. I still listen to professionals, but I also trust my own observations and intuition. I make sure my daughter’s voice is part of the conversation—because it’s her experience. I’m firm, I’m fair, and I don’t let the system push us around. Every child deserves access to a quality education. Having a disability should never mean receiving less.
Empowerment Over “Fixing”
Instead of trying to “fix” my daughter, I focus on empowering her. We sit down together and discuss her interests, strengths, and goals. Sometimes she struggles to believe in herself. That’s when I remind her that we aren’t identifying barriers to point out shortcomings. Pointing out barriers gives her the opportunity to share with others on how they can be reduced and overcome.
Together, we name what gets in the way and strategize how to move forward. It is important to remember that this process is not limited to parents; identifying and eliminating barriers should be a community effort. Teachers, government officials, community leaders, and peers all play a role in helping children with disabilities participate fully and confidently. Our job is to empower them and help them find their voice so that they can thrive.
Reframing the Narrative on Autism
When my daughter was diagnosed with autism, it didn’t feel like a setback. It felt familiar because I am on the spectrum myself. For me, the diagnosis was an invitation to build a deeper connection with my daughter and a reminder to work toward a world that fully includes her.
I recognize that every family processes a diagnosis differently. Because of systemic barriers and a lack of public understanding, many parents feel overwhelmed or fearful when they first learn their child has a developmental disability. These feelings are often a response to a society that isn't always built with neurodivergence in mind.
Navigating a world that lacks proper support is exhausting. People with intellectual and developmental disabilities (IDD) face discrimination and physical or social barriers every day. However, these challenges are not character flaws, and autism is not something that needs to be fixed or cured.
The narrative needs to shift away from seeing IDD as a problem to be solved and toward seeing the person. Our children should not have to change who they are to fit into the world. Instead, our communities, schools, and workplaces should change to meet them with understanding and genuine opportunity. When we build systems with inclusion in mind, the entire community benefits.
If you are a parent, educator, or advocate walking a similar path, your voice and your child’s voice matter. By advocating for better policies and more inclusive spaces, we can make the world listen.
Your gift helps create inclusive opportunities for people with intellectual and developmental disabilities—empowering individuals to live with independence, dignity, and purpose. Together, we’re building a stronger, more inclusive community.
You Can Help Make Spokane A Little More Inclusive Today!
You Can Help Make Spokane A Little More Inclusive Today!
Your gift helps create inclusive opportunities for people with intellectual and developmental disabilities—empowering individuals to live with independence, dignity, and purpose. Together, we’re building a stronger, more inclusive community.